One mother’s story (Emma) describes the psychological impact on her children because of her ex husband’s sexual offences. What happens to a family when a parent is arrested for online sexual offences? “Your world just collapses and you fear that nothing will ever ever be the same again” said Emma.
Emma highlights the devastating impact that ‘the knock’ has upon families, yet there is little to no support for these families.
Emma said, “we weren’t signposted anywhere. It’s all on the non-offending parent to make it up as they go along and there is no tailored support for the children. It had an immense psychological impact upon the whole family and the house was permeated with misery, uncertainty and fear, as much as I tried to hide these emotions from them”.
“One of the key positive movements was talking to people who were going through something similar. The online forums such as Lucy Faithfull’s ‘Friends and Family’, reaching out to those to not be alone with it”. Emma also says “do not be afraid to speak to your GP”.
Children Heard and Seen is one charity trying to fill the gap offering services to these children (and non-offending partners). They offer online support across the UK to those families who have a parent in prison for sexual offences. Sarah Burrows (CEO) told the BBC about the lonely and stigmatising experience that it can be for families. Families are ‘guilty by association’ even though they had no idea about the other parent’s offending. It has come as a complete shock, yet they are judged. Hopes and dreams are lost.
James Ottley, Operational Manager, said. “Lots of families need a lot of help at the begininning surrounding what to tell the children etc. We run a zoom group every week for the non-offending parent and it offers a safe space to have a cry (or a rant!) with others”.
Listen here to the full BBC Four programme.