Before I came to sex addicts anonymous, I didn’t know my problem even had a name, all I knew was that I couldn’t control my sexual behaviour. For me sex had become a consuming way of life, I returned to the same behaviours over and over despite the consequences to me and my family becoming worse and worse.
When I went to SAA I discovered that my sex addiction was a disease that it was affecting my mind, body and spirit. I heard about others sharing their own experience about how progressive this problem becomes, my behaviour certainly got worse and more severe over time.
Our out-of-control sexual behaviours might include high levels of promiscuity, compulsive masturbation, excessive use of both legal and illegal internet pornography, use of chat rooms and dating sites, multiple anonymous sexual encounters, exhibitionism, sex work and much more besides.
Sex addiction is a shame-based condition. Most sex addicts use the powerful stimulus of sex to escape the toxic feelings experienced from shame. Sex addiction can be understood as not dissimilar to other addictions. What sex addicts do is use sex in the same way as others use alcohol or drugs, gambling, or overeating. We do it to survive the intolerable. We get high on it, in almost trance-like states or stasis where we can block out our difficult feelings.
Download the full pdf version of Frank’s Story here.